Tsuna, God of Skies: The Energy Cheapskate
by Lillidappler
Summary: His first mission, given by the High Council of Gods: Create and manage a planet on a ridiculously small budget. Oh boy. This'll be fun. No, it won't, I'm being sardonic! HIATUS NOTICE INSIDE


_Hello, I'm a god of this solar system. _

_I'm going to make a new planet. _

_As decided by assembly, _

_My budget is ten quintillion Japanese Yen. _

* * *

"So it's decided. Sawada Tsunayoshi, God of Skies, will be required to manage a planet. His budget will be ten quintillion Japanese Yen. May the God of Luck bless you all, you may leave now."

Tranquility, the god of peace and order, slammed his fancy wooden hammer (what do they call them? Gavels?) into the table before dismissing the High Council of the Gods, which included the most powerful and influential gods.

Tsuna gulped as he trudged away from the meeting room. He had a _bad _feeling about this.

* * *

_I wouldn't say that it's an abundant amount,_

_But that's just where I shine;_

_With liberal use of my godly saving skills,_

_I'll at least try and make things work._

* * *

Tsuna intently focused on his current project- making a planet. Brows furrowed, he neatly stitched mountains, oceans and deserts on a cotton-stuffed sphere.

Nana, God of Luck, Mothers, and Good Cooking, smiled as she watched her son work on what he had dubbed 'Earth'.

Gently closing the door she had ever-so-slightly opened, Nana turned around, throwing some sparks of luck after her towards her son. (So what if it's nepotism and she's upsetting the balance of luck?)

Tsuna sneezed as he received the luck, looking before sighing and returning to his work. _Really, Mom, if you give me any more luck, I'll be receiving complaints from the High Council. _

Despite his thoughts, he smiled as he worked on an island.

* * *

_I made some low budget creatures,_

_And dubbed them humans._

_Their cheap little heads are full of faults;_

_They're lacking several parts. _

* * *

Tsuna admired the little cutout creatures he had made. Sprinkling magic on them, he waited.

As they sprung to life, they looked around for a minute. Catching sight of one another, they began to wrestle, trying to kill each other.

"No! Stop it!" The creatures he dubbed 'humans' gave him an odd stare.

"Get him!" A brave one shouted, picking up a needle from the floor and wielding it like a sword.

They all charged at him. Tsuna paled as he counted 18 needles (why did he buy them in bulk?) in total. _I'm dead. Wait, I can't die. _

As the first needle was stabbed into his ankle, Tsuna yelped in pain and facepalmed simultaneously.

_Correction: I'm screwed. _

* * *

_They're a rather troublesome, over-emotional sort;_

_They've always have troubles, so they pray to me… _

* * *

Tsuna lazily watched a couple from his haven in the sky he called 'heaven'. The girl was currently full-out crying on her boyfriend's shoulder as he patted her back and had a look that meant he was either confused or constipated.

"Sawada-sama! Sawada-sama!" One of the winged penguins waddled up to Tsuna. "I've got the report on prayers."

Tsuna groaned, wishing he had made humans more atheistic. _The Prayer Hotline is so expensive, _he mentally whined, looking sadly at his checkbook.

"Wouldja like ta hear it?" The penguin leaned in and gave Tsuna an expectant stare.

Tsuna waved a hand, commanding him to go ahead.

"There is a total of 1,534,109,478 prayers for someone to get well soon."

"There is a total of 2,437,995,783 prayers for kids to get sick so they may skip school."

Tsuna hand acquainted itself to his face in a becoming-frequent facepalm.

* * *

_Don't pray like it's a toll-free call, dammit!_

_I'm the one who has to work the costs! _

_If you waste money on that kind of junk,_

_I'll have less to spend on the ozone layer!_

* * *

"Sawada-sama, would this work?" Tsuna was handed some documents from Pippin, his head assistant, who was, like all his other workers, a winged penguin.

"Tsuna looked over the papers, seemingly frustrated. He turns to his awesome assistant and says…" Pippin put a microphone in front of Tsuna.

"One. What are you doing? Two. Quit it. Three. This is over budget. Either these stupid monstrosities of mine will have to quit praying or we'll have to cut back on the ozone layer. We can say it was their pollution…" Tsuna trailed off, muttering about global warming.

Pippin merely scribbled some notes down for a documentary. Huh? Oh yes, he was making a documentary to earn money. He'd even give their star, Tsunayoshi, maybe 10% of the profits.

Isn't he a great assistant?

* * *

_Hell, I might as well link your peanut brains_

_To a LAN connector with the heavens!_

* * *

"Sawada-sama, what are you doing?" Tsuna blinked. He really had no clue. What were these wires in his hands?

"I have no idea," he answered truthfully.

Pippin gave him an odd stare. "Well, you were muttering about linking the ' incompetent humans' ' brains with the heavens' after you heard the report on terrorism."

Tsuna's face hardened as he remembered his original ploy. _Why, if I can correct those idiotic humans, then…! _

Pippin, who had watched his boss stalk off with an evil grin on his face, rolled his eyes before waddling after Tsuna. _Better stop the Bossman before he does something too stupid. _

* * *

_The creatures I had dubbed humans_

_Pondered with their deficient brains._

_They were so curious and energetic; _

_They dared to seek their planet's secrets. _

* * *

Tsuna sat idly in a lecture at Namimori University. Why were the classes so _easy? _Seriously. World geography was much harder on his home planet, Domum Deorum.

"As we can see, you pathetic herbivores, America borders _three _different oceans. How you forget to include Alaska, I'm not sure, but congrats to the half of the class who are idiots."

A piece of chalk was slammed onto a desk as Professor Hibari Kyoya scanned the class, looking for troublemakers to punish. (Hey, he was stressed.)

A-ha! There, in the purple cap!

"Herbivore with the purple hat." Tsuna, who wasn't really listening, turned his head towards Hibari.

_Pwing! _A piece of chalk hit his forehead, dead center. "Ow!" Tsuna rubbed his forehead and glared (it was more like pouting) at the teacher.

Hibari just stood there, flabbergasted. _That blow would knock any herbivore out… Omnivore? _Oh yes, very intelligent thought process there, Kyoya.

"Who are you?"

Tsuna froze at the question. He was supposed to sneak into the lecture, get a feel for what humans of this age do, and then sneak out and call it done. But _no. _It had to end up like… like… like THIS!

Tsuna tried to figure out what to say. "_Would you believe me if I was God… no, they think God's a girl, last I checked. Well, it's not my fault I take after my mother! …But then, I suppose my regular attire of what they call a 'toga' doesn't help, since it looks so much like a dress."_

"_Well, I could give them a demonstration of my powers, but then again, the paperwork would be __so __bothersome… maybe I'll just ask Pippin to deal with it? No, he's on a two-week vacation too Kaa-chan's planet, the hotspring planet… ugh, that sounds nice. Stupid humans and their pollution and praying. Seriously. I hate religion. HATE. Loathe, despise; loathe, despise; and all that is a synonym." _

At this point, Tsuna realized that the class had odd (and awed) looks. "Did I say that out loud?"

Yup, his life sucks.

**I'm going to have to call that a stopping point since it's bedtime for me. :P**

**Anyways, yes, I will be going on a hiatus. It'll be nine weeks, probably longer because I'll have stuff to do once I get back from the thing I'll be doing. I wanted to make a oneshot to go along with my hiatus notice, but it's incomplete. Just enjoy it for now.  
**

**But until then... read other fanfictions! I am not the only author out there! Especially for this archive! Why do I keep using exclamation marks, even when this is supposed to be a question!  
**

**LOL (lots of love)  
**

**-Lillidappler  
**


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